dating values. true to that and hopefully everyone will take a step back to realize what r his values and what he’s looking 4

you made one mistake in your comment. Well.. perhaps a few…
But thanks nonetheless for agreeing to part of what i had to say, whatever part that mey have been…
But you mentioned “leaving South Africa”
and how this tradegy that is gay men, filled with pretencious attitudes and casual desires, is limited to South Africa…
Well, you are VERY WRONG on that front im afraid..
The reason this “mere 21 year old” aka.. ME.. Could speak from experience, is Because I have also travelled, and lived abroad quite a bit…
Germany, Portugal, London England, and im now in the Far East..China to be exact.. I assure you
you will find the same problems all over the world, that you find in South Africa.. infact perhaps even more..WHY? because culturally they are different to South AFricans, and you’re guaranteed to hit a land mine or 10…
Perhaps, though China is the only place I have discovered, there is not much, one nighter wonder encounters and so on.. Perhaps its the Fear instilled upon the People, homosexualty is still illegal here… But Im afraid culturally the men are simply too different for my liking, i havnt met anyone who has remotly sparked my interest, Sure there are those really good looking guys with alot going for them, but just no spark..as yet..

South Africa
Is a great place, filled with fucked up politicians, brilliant humanitarians, Gorgeous People, Dog ugly Pervs.. Rapists, Murderers, Artist, Poets, Martyrs
White, Black, Coloured, Asian, Hispanic and the like
Everything you can imagine
Going somewhere else, will change the circumstances of things but it will never solve the problems… I love home, but love to travel to.. so perhaps, some of us simply have bigger homes than others… but running away now thats a path no one should choose…

the basis of who you are is what you believe in…

and values are not necessrily only good things.. they are merely what underlies and motivates your behaviour.

Great article

Relationships. Lucky made a few valid statements. Very insightful for someone of a mere 21 years..
Which means that, like myself, he also discovered the terrible dissapointments in gay life, even when you go out with the best of intentions, somehow gay men always seems to dissapoint.
Lack of education? Rolemodels? Or maybe just common sense.
If you ask me it’s a lack of a spine. Gay men don’t have the balls to make a relationship work. It takes constant work and effort.
And we can’t have that! Much easier to just go find the newest take-away than actually bothering to stop and think about what is wrong with the existing relationship…
And that’s our own fault. Because sex is too easily available. If someone actually had to spend months getting to know someone without sex we’d all be much better off.
Then you would’ve actually spent your time wisely and not wasting it on the next fling whose name you won’t even remember tomorrow.
Meaningless, emoty experiences. That’s what the majority of you fags want.
I’m glad to say it’s only a South African thing. And I can’t wait to leave this pathetic country and the even more pathetic gay people here.
In 6 years I’ve met 4 people I can deem decent and these few friends will always have a special place in my heart.
But as for the rest of the so-called community, you desrver what you get. You’re doing it to yourself. Liars, cheaters, players. You’ll all end up alone and miserable.The best part is you don’t even realise what you’re doing.
You have no way of distinquishing between someone really special and just more trash.
If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got.
I don’t expect any of you to understand what this means as most of you use the wrong head to think. So don’t bother pondering.
And I seriously doubt I’ll get any response on this.
Oh, if you’d like to know what mr Right looks like, checkout “allornothing23”.
You might learn something. Or maybe not.

I mean, I just turned 21, In the world that is Gay Men, not even I am a Fresh Fish anymore.. just waiting to be caught.. Why? Beats me, but our expiry dates seem to hit closer to home far sooner, compared to our Heterosexual Counterparts..
I never really believed that dating advice had any validty.. mostly because, I’ve never really known if I even wanted to date.. Sure I’ve been down that path, I’ve gone to the bars, heard about the cute boy who was to shy to say HI..
Drank a few more cocktails, Headed to a club, but just before on my way out.. asked for his phone, dialled in my number, given him a kiss on the cheek, and told him to call.. without a thought.. I walked on and continued my fun..
We dated for 4 months..
We had similar values, we shared similar passions, our tastes varied.. and its all over..
so we move on, we find that cutie on the internet… We meetup for a drink, we have that first kiss in the drive way, when I droped him off at home..
And 4 months later, we had dated, and it was over once more..

A pattern emerges, maybe its all me.. I doubt any other answer could be closer to the truth, I can’t stay in the same Country for more than a year or 2, I can’t accept a desire to do nothing, I thrive on Passion, and I dwell on hope.. Imagination is all that calms..
Nevertheless
The dating realm cannot be solved, it isnt a mystery and it doesnt have a conclusion..
I is however a part of life, and though against my better judgment, I still seem to think that one day, some guy will come along that will make me pass that fourth month, that will make each day worth waking up to.. and I’ll probably have to go through a string of unfulfilling blind dates, party hookups, weekend flings and short term relationships..

But Hey, atleast Life is a game I love playing
do you?
I know this because I sometimes catch myself laughing, giggling or just simply smiling to myself at how bizaar life..
Even after I realise I have noticed a tear running down my cheek, because of how sad I sometimes am, far more often.. but that SMILE still stays…

Good Luck to all of you..
But thats not really what you need..
You just have to Live, and Learn who you are along the way, and on that path you’ll find Mr Right or Mr Right now, but still it’s wrth it…