Faith and sexuality: Embracing the paradox


As I sit here, reflecting on my journey, I can’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the opportunity to share my thoughts and experiences with you. This article marks a significant milestone for me—a new beginning, a fresh chapter in my life as a writer, and an avenue to explore the intricate paradox of Faith and sexuality.

In the complex tapestry of human existence, few struggles are as profound and complex as reconciling spirituality and sexuality. It is a journey that demands courage, introspection, and a willingness to question deeply ingrained beliefs.

As a former pastor who had to let go of my ordination due to my own sexuality, I intimately understand the pain, confusion, and ultimate liberation that comes from embracing the coexistence of faith and sexuality.

My journey began with a sense of dissonance—an undeniable truth about my sexuality that seemed to clash with the teachings I held dear. I had dedicated my life to serving my congregation, but as the realization of my own sexual orientation emerged, I found myself grappling with profound hurt and disappointment. The conflict tore at the very fabric of my being, leaving me feeling lost and disconnected from the spiritual path I had known.

Little did I know that my hurt and disappointment were guiding me towards a transformative journey—a journey of finding a place where my faith and sexuality could coexist in harmony. This path was not easy, nor was it straightforward. It required me to unravel the layers of societal conditioning, religious dogma, and personal biases that had clouded my understanding.

One of the critical aspects of my journey was the process of decoding the dogmas that had been ingrained within me. I realized that many interpretations of religious texts had been shaped by cultural and historical contexts, and often failed to account for the vast spectrum of human sexuality. By engaging in deep theological study, engaging in dialogue with scholars, and seeking out progressive faith communities, I discovered alternative interpretations that embraced the inclusivity and acceptance that resonated with my true self.

Embracing our sexuality does not diminish our faith; rather, it enhances our ability to connect with the divine

In the midst of my search, I discovered the power of community—the immense value of connecting with like-minded individuals who had faced similar struggles and emerged with a renewed sense of faith. Through support groups, LGBTQ+ affirming religious organizations, and online platforms, I found solace in the shared experiences and wisdom of others. Together, we navigate the complexities, challenge societal norms, and advocate for inclusive faith communities that celebrate the sacredness of diverse sexual orientations.

Ultimately, my journey led me to a profound realization: spirituality and sexuality are not mutually exclusive. In fact, they can enrich and inform one another, adding depth and authenticity to our spiritual lives. Embracing this coexistence required me to release the limitations imposed by external expectations and reconnect with the essence of my faith—an essence rooted in love, compassion, and the divine spark within each of us.

Through my experiences, I discovered that self-acceptance is a powerful catalyst for embracing the coexistence of spirituality and sexuality. It is through accepting and loving ourselves unconditionally that we can truly honour our spiritual journey. Embracing our sexuality does not diminish our faith; rather, it enhances our ability to connect with the divine, as we acknowledge and celebrate the fullness of our identities.

To those who find themselves in the throes of the struggle between faith and sexuality, I offer this message of hope: you are not alone. Your journey is unique, but it is also shared by countless others who have navigated similar paths. By questioning, seeking support, and engaging in self-reflection, you can find a place where your faith and sexuality coexist in harmony—a place of profound peace, acceptance, and spiritual fulfilment.

In this vast universe of possibility, the paradox of Faith and sexuality can be resolved. It is within our power to create inclusive and affirming spiritual spaces.


Ishmael Mokone is a published author, speaker, and versatile writer, blending fiction, poetry, and non-fiction to captivate readers. A former pastor, LGBTQIA advocate, and entrepreneur, they inspire with their diverse narratives, advocate for social change, and empower audiences through their compelling speeches.

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