NAKED COWBOY TO RUN FOR MAYOR

Robert John Burck, known as New York’s Naked Cowboy, has announced that he will run for the position of the city’s mayor.

Burck is a performance artist who stands around New York City’s Time Square wearing just his briefs, boots and a cowboy hat, performing with his guitar for tips.

“I know how to do more with less,” said Burck as he announced his bid this Wednesday in Times Square. “Being naked is a whole lot more than having no clothes on: It’s about transparency in politics, it’s about telling the naked truth.”

He’s up against New York’s current Mayor, Michael Bloomberg, who is vying for his third term. One of the issues that the Naked Cowboy promises to support in his campaign is same-sex marriage.

His campaign website states: “Well, this is New York City, and let’s face it: there’s a lot of very merry cowboys — and cowgirls — around here. But they’re people just like anyone else. And look, I’m an ordained minister. I perform marriage ceremonies all the time. And I’ve love to be able to marry all the citizens of New York City, not just us straight shooters.”

Burck, who is a major crowd-pleaser, has a political science degree from the University of Cincinnati. He’s also written several self-published motivational books and cut a country music album.