WATCH: COMING OUT TO MY MOM
A young American man has recorded his emotional coming out to his mother and posted it on YouTube.
Ryan Dubs filmed himself with his laptop as he tearfully told his mother that he is gay.
The video has gone viral and been viewed almost 120,000 times.
Dubs said that he made the video because he wanted to help other people.
“When I was contemplating coming out for the last year, I found other similar videos of people coming out to family members on a hidden camera really helpful,” he wrote.
“I noticed that there weren’t very many of these videos, so I wanted to create my own to help other people in the same way that I found these videos helpful.
“My mom reacted in an amazing way, and I really hope that all of you have a similar experience,” Dubs added.
Watch the remarkable video below (and have tissues standing by).
Ok I’ll be the shallow one… He’s hot!
Its interesting that he started crying and behaving like a little boy when revealing this truth to his mother. Its almost as if he wanted validation and support by reverse psychology i.e if I already look “sorry” and “fragile” , then you’ll take the up road by being supportive and loving.
And how she responded by being the anxious mother, holding the baby in her arms, and trying to understand what could be so troubling to her “infant”.
Then when he tells her, she says “It’s okay that you’re gay” :Naturally she wouldn’t have behaved any other way, given the nature of the buildup to the coming out.
But his response is interesting, because he says ” No, its not.”
Even though this was a brave move on his front, we must take note and remember that ,if we come out to them looking “ashamed”, “broken” and “vulnerable”, they will think that here is indeed something terrifying and monstrous about being gay that they need to protect their “child” from.
Now, in an effort to comfort us, they’ll say things like “It’s okay baby” or”I will always love you” etc. This is fine but here, the dialogue begins from a very unequal place: the mother seeks to comfort and assure whilst the guy coming out seeks approval and affirmation of her love. These are the things we should know about ourselves before leaping.
If we know that we are okay and loved ,then an honest conversation can start: where a parent is free to ask the “controversial” questions(and they will) and you can answer to the best of your ability.
Coming out is not to garner support and alliance with those external to us but is really for the individual concerned to say “This is who I am and thank God I finally remembered”.
Kudos to him. But he needs to also learn to let being gay be okay in him too.
Well lovelife he’s not going to get a do over so “nextime” ain’t gonna happen. What ur saying has merritt but once u come rite down to it… you rly don’t know how ur going to approach regardless of how many times u rehearsed it ppl tend to forget that when ur coming out ur tring to break through a lifetime of understandable rational fear not everybody handles it the same way but they do seem to handle it kudos to you Ryan… Oh by the way… I totally agree with Brent what sexy guy;-)