MAMBA GOSSIP

Chris Carmack gets wet

You may recognise the rather tasty Chris Carmack from his small role in Desperate Housewives – in which he plays Susan’s troublemaking cousin Tim. He was recently spotted taking some time off on the beach in Hawaii while filming scenes for a new movie. You should know by now that our first gossip item is always a feeble excuse to show off some celebrity flesh – so here it is!

Lindsay’s lesbian romance confirmed

After much speculation about the nature of Lindsay Lohan’s relationship with DJ Samantha Ronson, and recent pictures of the two smooching, Lindsay’s father seems to have officially confirmed that the girls are in lurve – despite her mother’s denial. He’s been quoted by Us Weekly as saying that their affair “is evident to anyone with half a brain.” He’s clearly not too impressed though, adding that, “…there are just some things a father doesn’t want to see or hear, regardless of whether they are true or false. [Lindsay] is a big girl, and she can make her own life choices. Then it is between her and God.” Lesbianism is not Lindsay’s problem, but rather, in our opinion, the shocking behaviour of her spotlight-obsessed parents. Poor girl.

Bond: Amy out, Beyoncé in?

While it had been reported that Amy Winehouse was lined up to record the theme song for the new James Bond movie, Quantum Of Solace, word is that her erratic drug-addled behaviour has gotten her fired. It’s now rumoured that Beyoncé will instead be offering her vocal skills to Her Majesty’s Secret Service.

Shirley Bassey goes under the knife

You may have considered 71 year old diva Shirley Bassey as super-human (after all, she continues to belt out Diamonds Are Forever and Big Spender as if she’s still 30), but she proved to be all too mortal this week. The legendary Welsh-born singer is recovering from an emergency operation to her stomach. According to her spokesperson, Shirley was rushed to hospital in Monaco after complaining of abdominal pains at night. Doctors say that she should still be able to make Nelson Mandela’s 90th birthday concert in London next month. She’ll outlive us all!

Sex premieres in New York and Joburg

Tuesday night saw the New York and Joburg premieres of the Sex and the City movie. Manhattan was “carried away” as gaggles of celebs – including Jerry Seinfeld, Ashley Olsen, Donna Karan, Mary J. Blige and Fergie – came out to see the anticipated flick. All the film’s stars also attended, with the leading ladies dazzling in metallic outfits. In Joburg, the premiere at Montecasino was considerably less stellar with a handful of c-grade local celebs, such as former Big-Brother-contestant-turned-DJ Margaret van der Westhuizen and former Miss South Africa Vanessa Carrera, making an appearance. The rather perfunctory event was dogged by too many people and queues; to get in, to get out and to get a blasted drink (the cocktails were named after the film’s characters). The hot dogs were yummy but the gift bags sucked!

Jodie’s other woman revealed

Jodie Foster’s recent breakup with her girlfriend of 14 years, Cydney Bernard, came as a surprise to many, but even more will be shocked to learn that the star had apparently been cheating on Cydney with another woman. According to Hollywood insiders, the split was caused by Jodie having an affair with writer and producer Cynthia Mort. The two apparently met two years ago on the set of the movie The Brave One (co-written by Cynthia) and the relationship progressed to the point that Jodie decided to leave Cydney. The former love-birds are expected to share custody of their two boys and are said to still be living together while Jodie plans her new life with Cynthia.

Madonna throws hotel tantrum

Superstar Madonna rightly threw her toys out the cot in Cannes when she discovered that a camera crew had been allowed to film her room at the Carlton Hotel just before she arrived. A hotel representative gave the crew a personal tour of the suite showing off all the preparations requested by the star including her gym equipment, special purified water, scented candles and the room temperature set at 30 degrees Celsius. The footage was broadcast on television and, as a result, Madonna is said to have refused to pay the $95,000 bill. Good on you girl!

Boyzone gets naked

Members of popular Nineties UK teenage boy band Boyzone have been working out in preparation for their reunion tour. The boys decided to show off their new physiques (and no doubt garner a little publicity) by posing in the buff for pictures. Band member Ronan Keating told the UK’s Heat magazine that, “We’re all on diets and we’ve been training in the gym every day. I’m probably the fittest now that I’ve ever been. I think we all look better now than before.” Personally, we think the best specimen among the now thirty-something bunch is without a doubt openly gay Stephen Gately (who at one point was looking rather portly). The tour has been described as a “raunched-up show for the grown-up Boyzone, with half-naked dancers gyrating along to the hits.”

Mr Sulu to tie the knot

Openly gay actor George Takei, best known for his iconic role as Mr Sulu in the original Star Trek series and movies (and recently seen in Heroes), is set to marry his boyfriend of 21 years. The news came on the heels of the recent legalisation of same sex marriage in the state of California. Boldly going where [few] men have gone before, the 71 year thespian, wrote on his website about his fiancé: “He is my love and I can’t imagine life without him. Now, we can have the dignity, as well as all the responsibilities, of marriage. We embrace it all heartily.” He added that the two are “enjoying the delicious dilemma of deciding where, when, and how we will be married.”